Part time friends.

I've sort of already ranted about this before, but I don't care, I'm doing it again and if you don't like it, stop reading now. But really, keep reading.

Okay. So I have a few friends that try to pull this "part-time friend" bullshit with me.

What is a part-time friend, you might ask?

A part-time friend is a person that you don't see very often or talk to very often. You probably don't even hear from them very often, and when you do, it's usually because they want to talk about themselves. Do you have one? I bet you do.

I fucking hate these people.

Sorry, I don't want to have you text me or talk to me on Facebook just so you can talk about your new significant other and how great they are. I don't want this to happen because you're not going to speak to me again until you need to tell SOMEONE about all of the super fantastic interesting things going on in your life.

If I'm having some kind of get together, don't be surprised if you aren't invited. Don't try to wrangle yourself an invite if you aren't invited. If you aren't invited, it's because I don't consider us close enough to bother right now, and/or because your behaviour is pissing me off and I currently wish that you would die.

The one that really gets me is people who talk to me just to talk about themselves. I have one "friend" in particular that does this. I go months without hearing a word from them, and suddenly they're texting me or messaging me on Facebook, talking about their life, seeking advice, and then promptly shutting up once they've used my vast amounts of wisdom. It's another couple of months til I hear from them again, and the same thing happens.

Here's some brutal honesty. I probably give you my advice because I want to be able to say "I told you so" when you don't follow it and end up fucking things up for yourself. I may not say it to your face, but my god am I fucking thinking it. Even if I don't give you advice out of spite, I do it because I think I'm generally rather good at it, and any advice that I have to give is good practice for when people that actually matter to me ask for it.

In short:

If you treat me like shit, if you only try to be present in my life when it suits you, if you only want to be included in things I'm doing because your other "friends" will be there, if you only talk to me for advice, if you literally don't know the first thing about what's going on in my life, if you can't even be bothered to ask me how I am once in a while, if you're going to try and excuse your douchebaggery by saying you've been busy with your significant other, I would like to take this opportunity to tell you to fuck the fuck off.

If you do this, my tags seem to indicate that I really fucking hate this, to the point that I used three different tags to say "I hate you". Please take this as a warning. And do not try and call me out if you think this post is about you. It's not really about anyone in particular, but if you think this applies to you, it probably does. So make your decision. If you want to try and stay friends, great. If not, I obviously don't really care.